Good God... single digits!

I guess I haven't looked at the baby widget since it said "10 days to go"... Now it says "7 days to go" and it hit me like a ton of bricks.

I've been feeling a little down since yesterday; not really sure why. Cleo hasn't moved a whole lot today, so maybe I'm just nervous and worried. I'm pretty sure everything's still normal, there's just no room left for her to be all that active.

As I was awake from 4 to 6 this morning, I thought of several things to blog about but I didn't write them down. Of course, I've forgotten about them by now. Harumph.

Normally I would read a chapter or so in whatever non-baby/birth-related book and then I'd fall back to sleep, but last night I finished Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain for the second time. I read it pretty soon after it came out in 2001 or 2002, but a week or two ago I saw it at a friend's house and had to borrow it for a re-read. It got me started on a restaurant kick, and now I want to read Alice Waters and Chez Panisse by Thomas McNamee. I saw it on the bookstand at my favorite local supermarket and I should have bought it then. I met Alice Waters and several other CP folks while working for David Lance Goines in 1999--this new book seems to "dish the dirt" somewhat about how the restaurant came to be and all of the personal realtionships between the players. I knew that Alice and David had been a couple around the time of CP's birth and the Free Speech Movement, but knowing a little more about all of it certainly couldn't have hurt my understanding of how they work together these days. David still creates artwork and posters for Chez Panisse... I'll never forget the time he worked up a gorgeous design for a CP birthday poster and Alice said "it was too... too." David was able to decipher that, fix it somehow and it was approved after that one change. They still have that connection.

So, last night, instead of reading to try to get back to sleep, I tried counting backwards from 100. When I reached 0, still awake, I kept going. "Negative 1, negative 2, negative 3..." It wasn't working. I noticed that I was able to count and think about other things at the same time. This was not a huge revelation--I'm sure everybody does it everyday. It just frustrated me that I was multi-tasking in my head while actually trying to fall asleep. It just doesn't work.

Now I'm tired, frustrated, bored and depressed. Not a good combination. I think I'm going to go for a walk. I might not need anything at the drug store, but at least it looks different than the inside of our house.